Grand Romance: An MM Gay Romance Page 2
“He really did hate me dripping dirt all over the place.”
“Says you. Maybe you were all ruggedly handsome and he was swooning inside.”
“…right.”
“Mark my words. I bet you that he’ll try to find a way to make you be his guide to get a good couple of hours of alone time with you.”
“And what will you bet me? I need to make it something really good. Then when I’m proven right, I can rub it in your face properly.”
“You’re a brat.”
“But you love me.”
“Unfortunately. Look, just scope him out, try asking if he wants to get lunch or something. See what happens. Or even just ask around and see what other people say about him. Maybe he’s talked about you or whatever.”
“Fine.” Alex would do it, if only to prove his brother wrong.
Logan wasn’t interested in him like that, and Alex was going to prove it. If it took a little snooping, then so be it.
4
Alex actually didn’t have to find anyone to talk to or even visit the bookstore again. The very next day, Jane came up to him while he was eating out on a picnic bench, watching the sun setting.
He loved the canyon at all different times of the day. Nighttime might have been his favorite, when the moon was spilling silver and pearl white down into the canyon and he felt like he was suddenly seeing an alien world. But the sunrise and sunset, with the colors spilling out like a knocked over container of paints—that was pretty damn great too.
Jane was another bookstore worker, part-time since she was in school as well. Alex had always liked her. She was the type of person who was easy to talk to but didn’t gossip. She expressed her opinion frankly, but usually only when it was asked for.
Which was why it shocked him when she sat down and immediately said, “So what’s the deal with you and Logan?”
Alex stared at her. “There is no deal between me and Logan.”
Jane frowned, although she didn’t look displeased so much as puzzled. “Are you sure? Because if you want to maintain your privacy I completely understand. I wouldn’t even normally ask, it’s just—”
“It’s not about maintaining privacy. There’s just—we’re sort-of coworkers. We’re not even that, we’re two people who work in the same physical area. We’ve only spoken a couple of times.”
Jane nodded, biting her lip as she processed this information. “So you would say that there isn’t anything… between you?”
“Between us? I mean, I thought he hated me for a while but turns out he’s just awkward as fuck. So, if you’re asking if there’s a rivalry or something, no, we’re all good. I mean I was kind of pissed at him for a bit, but it’s all fine now.”
Jane sighed, like Alex was an idiot. “I meant in the flirting, crushing kind of way.”
“What?” Alex was glad he hadn’t taken a bite of food, otherwise he would’ve choked on it. “Jane, the guy glared at me for weeks for tramping into his bookstore all dirty. And then when he apparently decided to bury the hatchet, he did it in the most obscure way possible.”
Jane shrugged. “Not all of us are smooth at picking up tourists from the bar.”
“Ouch, that wounds me.” Alex put his hand over his heart, faking a dramatic swoon for a moment. “But seriously—what makes you think this? Are you sure he’s not just being awkward?”
“He’s just like that at first. He pissed off all of us when he first replaced Diana. He’s really strict and has his set way of doing things. No time for pleasantries. But he’s a good guy. He’s really sweet when you get to know him. He bought me a coffee and muffin and brought them to me when I was crying one day from school stress.
“But he’s ranted about you from day one. Like, at first I think he was pissed at you, but he kept yelling about you in a really… flattering way? Like he’d complain about how your stupid handsome face and your stupid hands were going to get dirt everywhere. How being that sexy probably meant you got away with everything. You know, that kind of insulting.”
“What.” Alex felt like the earth had stopped moving. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious. And then he started asking all kinds of questions about you since we know each other pretty well. Then he asked what he could do to try and get to know you.”
“You’re not teasing me right now? This isn’t some weird prank that you’re pulling because you think you’re hilarious?”
“I am hilarious, but no, this isn’t a prank. And I thought…” Jane scuffed her shoe along the ground. “I didn’t want to say anything, but I’m pretty sure he was hinting that he wants you to take him on a hike as a kind of getting to know you activity. I just know he’s not going to do it properly. I want you to know what’s going on because how can you take someone on a date or turn them down for a date when you don’t know there’s even a possible date on the table, right?”
“Um, right. So—so when he told me yesterday that he’d never been hiking on any of our trails…”
“He was hoping you’d offer to take him on a hike, yeah,” Jane confirmed. “Like I said, he’s hopeless at this kind of thing. But I promise you, even just as a friend he’s worth getting to know. He’s a really smart guy. Plus, he’s funny once he warms up to you and doesn’t feel so out of place. I know he’s got that whole nerdy look going on so maybe that’s not your thing…”
“Trust me, his looks were never the problem,” Alex assured her. His looks had been the only thing going for him the past month.
“I just… I don’t think you’ll get the message if unless you hear it clearly from someone else. At least now if you’re not interested, you can find a nice way to turn him down.” Jane bit her lip. “I feel guilty telling you this. He’d kill me if he knew. And I know it’s none of my business. But I’m worried that at this rate, it would take six months or something for you to figure it out on your own.”
“I appreciate it Jane, thanks. And I won’t tell him how I figured it out or anything.” He wasn’t going to embarrass the guy with gossip or meddling.
“Thanks.” Jane wrapped her arm around his shoulders to give him a quick half-hug. “And I know, again, not my business, but if you were to spend some time with him… he’s not good in quick interactions, and I think having a crush on you made him worse than usual. But if you spend a good hour with him, he’s really great.”
“I’ll think about it Jane. Thanks.”
She nodded, smiled and got up. “I’ll leave you to your lunch.”
His finished lunch with his thoughts running around like hamsters in a cage.
Looked like either both Ben and Jane were wildly wrong, or Ben had somehow been right all along. He didn’t think Jane would be so wrong about someone she worked with all the time, especially if she felt strongly enough to talk to him about it. She had to be certain of her convictions if she was taking the step of interfering and telling him.
So that whole time he’d thought Logan didn’t like him, Logan had been crushing on him? It felt counterintuitive, to glare at someone you thought was cute. Aside from anything else, Alex was dying to talk to the guy and find out why he’d had that reaction. A plethora of ideas ran through his mind, from the dramatic to the ridiculous. But there was only one way to find out if any of this was true: talk to Logan.
5
Logan had come to the Grand Canyon with one very specific goal in mind: get as far away from Boston as possible.
He’d considered moving to a small town, but he’d seen enough movies to know that was a stupid idea. When people were trying to hide from something they always went to a small town. But really, a small town was the exact sort of place they’d get noticed and remembered. Oh, you’re looking for a blond guy with glasses? Yeah he just moved in; we all delivered pies; and,
here’s his address.
No, a small town was right out. But he couldn’t handle another city, not right now. Even though Los Angeles and Seattle and so many other places were also far away. He’d also wanted somewhere with a climate as different from Boston as possible—he wanted as few reminders of his former home as he could manage.
The Grand Canyon had been perfect. It wasn’t a city, and was pretty much in the middle of nowhere. But there were plenty of tourists, lots of seasonal staff, and so it’d be easy to blend in and avoid making friends if he wanted to. Not to mention, the canyon was gorgeous. Working in a bookstore, surrounded by quiet… it felt perfect. He’d been happy with his choice.
Maybe, for some people, moving across the country to work in the middle of nowhere just because of a broken heart was a little extreme. But the whole reason Logan had even been in Boston in the first place was Tim.
Logan didn’t have any family—his parents had died young—and no friends growing up. When his high school boyfriend had decided to go to Boston University, well, Logan hadn’t had anyone else and he wasn’t ambitious. He just wanted to be a librarian or work with books in some way. So why not go with Tim to Boston? Why not stay?
He hadn’t noticed how much his life had revolved around Tim until Tim had started pulling away. All of Logan’s friends were really Tim’s friends. He wasn’t good with people, and so everyone he knew, he knew through Tim. The apartment was in Tim’s name for various reasons that had made sense at the time.
He’d thought—well, he’d thought a lot of things. Mostly that his introverted nature balanced out Tim’s voracious need to socialize. But Tim hadn’t seen it that way, apparently. Instead of being an adult about it and just breaking up with him, he’d decided cheating on Logan would be a whole lot better instead.
Hence: the Grand Canyon.
Moving had been a lot easier than he’d expected. He needed a change of scenery, a clean break, something new. Diane had wanted to retire, so why the hell not? He liked his staff and being a manager since he didn’t have to interact with the customers too much. He could hide in the back room as much as he wanted.
And then—Alex.
The one possibility Logan hadn’t accounted for was being attracted to someone here. He’d been with Tim for so long, his only relationship either sexual or romantic, his high school sweetheart. It literally hadn’t occurred to him that he might develop feelings for someone else.
Then Alex had to walk in that first day, all ruggedly handsome and looking like he’d stepped out of the pages of an adventure novel. He was a bit dirty, but in that ‘I’m an alpha male’ way that made him all the more attractive. He had dark hair, dark flashing eyes, stubble and a square jaw, and God, his arms and shoulders and—just all of him.
Logan’s brain had completely short circuited.
That last thing he needed was someone else breaking his heart. And Logan was well aware that a guy as handsome as Alex was not going to look twice at nerdy, socially inept, tie-and-sweater-vest wearing Logan.
And Alex had been all dirty and possibly getting that on the books, so…
Logan fully understood that he hadn’t started things off on the right foot.
It hadn’t helped that apparently, Alex had a reputation for picking tourists up in the bar. Male tourists, which made it worse. If he’d been straight, then Logan could have happily set aside his crush. But the fact that there was a hypothetical possibility that Alex might want him…
Logan had been determined to hate the guy, - the easy smile, dirt and tanned skin, dark eyes - and pat himself on the back that he wouldn’t be another notch in Alex’s bedpost.
Of course, the universe just had to fuck with him even more.
“He hasn’t picked anyone up in ages,” Dennis told him when Logan brought it up during restocking in the back.
Dennis wasn’t Logan’s favorite coworker--that was Jane--but he was dry and funny. Logan could appreciate that.
“I thought you didn’t like the guy,” Logan pointed out.
“He’s a better flirt than I am. I think I’m allowed to be annoyed by that,” Dennis replied, sounding genuinely irritated by this fact. “But he’s not heading out to the bar the way he used to. I think since his brother got married, he’s been thinking about, you know, settling down too. And I mean… sure, he annoys me with the whole being a ten out of ten thing, but he cares about his job more than anything. He’s a good guy.”
“You really think that?”
“I mean, everyone likes him.” Dennis unpacked another box and started passing the books to Logan. “I think maybe he’s just waiting for someone who’s right. And hey, in the meantime what’s the harm in having fun with a visitor, right?” Dennis winked at him in a conspiratorial kind of way. “God knows I don’t see the harm in it, anyway.”
Logan rolled his eyes to show Dennis what he thought of his pick-up habits. “So he wouldn’t ever try to screw over a coworker.”
“No way. Alex cares way too much about his job. He’s not a jerk like that, he wouldn’t risk making his work environment uncomfortable.”
Dennis lowered his voice and glanced over his shoulder to make sure no one was going to stroll into the back room, “Why, has he tried to flirt with you?”
“No.” Just tried to be friendly before Logan shut him down like an asshole. “I just—it’s nothing, really—”
“Do you want him to flirt with you?” Dennis asked, his eyes narrowing in suspicion.
Dennis was a bit of a player, but he’d always been a good guy to Logan. Now he was looking at him like he already knew Logan’s answer. Logan told himself he might as well be honest. “I—I mean, he’s attractive. And the way you talk about him—I thought he was just the kind of guy who ran around breaking hearts not caring how someone felt when he was done with them. But I think now I might’ve been… comparing him too much to someone else I knew.”
“I mean, it’s hard to tell who the jerks are, and who’s just genuinely looking to have fun but is considerate about it,” Dennis acknowledged. “I think that if you want to see if he likes you, you should try. Get involved in his interests. Recommend a book on hiking or something.”
“I’m not sure.” Logan had spent the last month avoiding Alex and glaring at him from behind the stacks. SAlex remained stupidly handsome, which really wasn’t fair. “I think that ship might’ve sailed.”
“You never know until you try, right? And I’ve never heard Alex to have a bad word for anybody. He’ll be nice about letting you down, if that’s what he chooses.”
Logan nodded. The question, he realized, wasn’t so much whether or not Alex would be a good guy about it. He trusted Dennis’ judgement of Alex. Especially since Dennis had been honest about the things that Alex did that annoyed him. If Dennis said Alex was worth taking a chance on, then he really thought that. He wasn’t going to bullshit Logan.
It was a question of whether Logan could risk himself.
He’d just gone through the pain of watching someone he loved treat him like he didn’t matter. He’d trusted Tim with everything. And he’d known Tim since high school. That was a good decade of knowing and believing in him. If Tim could turn on him, then how could he trust someone that he barely knew not to do the same?
But then… he hadn’t taken a risk like this since he’d first gotten together with Tim in high school. Wasn’t it good practice to put himself out there for Alex? He’d been bold, moving far away to a place he’d never been where he didn’t know anyone. After all of that, asking someone out was nothing, right?
Unfortunately, Alex didn’t seem to be getting the hint.
Logan first tried by offering up the book he found on old trails. He’d thought it would be helpful, but Alex acted almost offended. Then when he’d come to Logan later, friendly, he hadn’t gotten Logan’s hint about taking him out for a hike.
He was going to have to be more obvious for Alex, and Logan really, really didn’t want to do that. For once he wanted
Alex to be able to read his mind and know that Logan wanted to try a date with him. But that didn’t seem likely. Just blurting out “I like you” or “would you like to go out on Friday” made his stomach feel like it was twisting up into knots and he almost wanted to throw up.
Perhaps he could phrase it as a friend sort of thing? That would take the pressure off both of them, right?
Logan occupied himself in the meantime with organizing the books and dealing with new shipments. They did a pretty fair trade in books, especially the morbid ones, which made no sense to Logan. Perhaps it was a way to prove that they had defied death? To brag to friends that they went to the canyon and bought this book all about how these other people had died but they hadn’t?
He was straightening out some books on a display that had been knocked over—parents needed to keep a better eye on their damn kids—when he felt someone walking up behind him. He stood abruptly and turned around.
Oh, fuck. It was Alex. Looking like Indiana Jones, as usual. Scruffy in a way that was attractive instead of annoying, hair sticking up a bit. Logan wouldn’t have been surprised if the man’s eyes had started fucking twinkling or something.
“Hey.” Alex smiled at him. It was sort of like the first smile that Alex had given him. Back when they’d first met, and Logan had retreated behind snootiness to hide the fact that he was having a heart attack. But it was a little more tentative than that smile. It was a little more… shy.
‘Shy’ wasn’t a word that Logan would have ever associated with Alex. The man oozed confidence.
“Hello.” Logan tried to keep his tone polite. His instinct with Alex—with anyone who made him feel wrong-footed—was to be rude, so they would go away. At least if they thought he hated them, then he didn’t have to worry about dealing with them later. Irritation was a wall that he could hide behind.
But he didn’t want to hide behind that wall anymore. Besides, he could always go back to irritation if Alex turned out to be a jerk despite what Jane and Dennis had said.